


Everyone Always Comes Back

by abifail



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Lifeguard Steve, M/M, PTSD, Panic Attacks, War Veteran Bucky
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-11
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2018-12-12 21:40:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11745735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abifail/pseuds/abifail
Summary: They have a saying at the pool where Bucky used to work. No matter how far someone strays they always come back there eventually, even if it's just to visit. Sure enough, ten years later, Bucky is back in town and surprised to find that his old friend Steve still works there.





	1. Home Again

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first published fanfiction on this site! Please forgive me if I didn't tag anything properly and let me know asap so I can fix it
> 
> The first chapter is quite short but I needed to post it to get myself going on this or else I would have abandoned it forever!
> 
> Rated Teen for now, may be updated to Mature later ;)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After almost a decade away from home Bucky returns and finds himself revisiting old haunts

The flight was only three hours long and despite the fact that Bucky had been on hundreds of flights in his life, many of them being to other continents, this one felt like the longest one yet. 

“Can I get your anything else, sir?” 

Bucky shook his head, biting back a comment about how the flight attendants had asked him that a million times already. It wasn’t their fault he was irritable so he held his tongue and told himself they were only doing their jobs. Restless, he awkwardly wrapped the small airline-provided blanket around his shoulders and spent the last half hour staring at the ceiling. 

This was the first time Bucky had been on an airplane since his discharge from the army and he wasn’t looking forward to the landing. Even before the accident he hadn’t been a big fan of flying, one plane crash later and now take-off alone had nearly sent him into a panic attack. He knew he could have easily chosen a different mode of transportation to return home but flying was the quickest and he didn’t have the energy required to take a train or drive a car for such a long distance so he had mustered up what amount of courage he had and forced himself onto the plane. Every bump of turbulence made his heart rate spike and by the end of it his hand was sore from clenching his fist so tightly and his palm was covered in half moon imprints from his fingernails. Thankfully the flight landed without incident and Bucky was beyond glad to be on solid ground again. His therapist had told him to celebrate the small victories and so this morning it was that he’d survived the trip but the real battle today was yet to come, one that he was not especially looking forward to.

After his legs were steady again he collected his luggage and made his way to the exit. It was early and there was no way Bucky was going to show up at his mom’s house at 6 in the morning when she didn’t even know that he was coming home so soon. Instead he rented a car at the airport and decided to go for a drive. Driving wasn’t easy for him anymore and he needed the practice so once he figured out how to get it in gear he began a slow tour of his old hometown. The place where he grew up was technically considered a city but had maintained its small town feeling by avoiding bringing in too many outside businesses or large chains. Lots of teens and young adults often complained about having to make the drive to the next city for certain fast food or stores but Bucky thought it was better this way. Maybe he was old fashioned or maybe he’d just gotten lost in a few too many really big cities around the world and it had made him appreciate the small one he grew up in. 

Bucky had hated the town when he was young though and joined the army straight out of high school to get away from it. His career was unfortunately short-lived but successful. In the decade since leaving home Bucky had done three tours in five years and then applied for Ranger school where he found his calling and become one of their youngest snipers. The next five years were exciting and terrifying and in the end heartbreaking after a plane crash had ended his career. Bucky had lost his arm but his team had lost their lives. 

Swallowing a lump in his throat he viciously shoved those thoughts away and pulled into the first parking lot he saw to catch his breath. Seeing that the lights were on in the building in front of him he took stock of where he was and suddenly realized that he’d ended up at the local swimming pool. Bucky had fond memories of this place, he’d worked there throughout high school and had loved almost everything about the job. Impulsively Bucky shut off the car and got out to pop the trunk and root around in his luggage for a swim suit he knew was stashed in there somewhere. 

Swimming was just about the only rehab his doctors had been able to get him to do and Bucky had relished the challenge of learning how to swim again with only one arm. He’d been a competitive swimmer for years before becoming a lifeguard and being in the water was second nature to him, plus it was less painful than many of the other exercises his physiotherapist tried to get him to do. After he finally found his suit Bucky slammed the trunk shut, the sound echoing in the quiet parking lot. A couple of other early risers had already made their way into the building while he was searching through his luggage so he followed them, keeping his head down as he paid for the swim and went to change. Changing clothes with one hand was one thing he wasn’t sure he would ever completely figure it out and because of this he’d taken to wearing sweats and t-shirts, he avoided buttons and zippers entirely so after only a little bit of struggling with the tight shorts he was ready to go.

A wave of nostalgia hit him the instant he walked out onto the deck. The pool had hardly changed in the seven years since he’d left and it was like stepping back into his past. There were new lane ropes and a couple of new pieces of equipment he hadn’t seen before but other than that everything was the same. The familiar too-yellow lighting made worse by the ugly beige walls paired with a smell of chlorine that was stronger than most places greeted him as he made his way over to the lap pool. Judging by how warm it was already he was willing to be that they still hadn’t fixed the ventilation system that had been broken for longer than Bucky had worked there, he imagined that they probably never would. He didn’t recognize the lifeguard who was on duty this morning but that wasn’t surprising considering most staff only worked there for two to three years before moving on to something else but she was friendly and didn’t even stare at his scars when she greeted him. The blond maintenance guy who was checking the pool temperature stared a little as Bucky made his way to the deep end but more at his face than anything else, almost as if he recognized him. Bucky was sure he probably looked only half alive as he offered the man a smile before turning towards the pool. 

As he stood at the edge of the water preparing to dive in Bucky’s mind took him back and for a moment he was sixteen again and about to race in the most important event of his young swimming career. Sixteen year old Bucky was cocky and confident and the best swimmer on the team but the minute his body hit the water the flashback was gone and in that moment the loss of his arm was especially bitter. He found himself wishing that he had accepted the swimming scholarships that he’d been offered and gone the route of an athlete rather than joining the army. With that thought Bucky lost himself in his swim, imagining what life could have been like rather than dwelling on what it was now.


	2. Adulting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Steve wants is a long nap, someone to love, and at least a $1000 in his bank account

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: it's been a while since I posted this and I've made a few changes so that it fits with the rest of what I've finally come up with.

The last thing Steve wanted to do today was go to work. He’d been up half the night finishing a few commission art pieces that he’d gotten behind on and now he was mad at himself for procrastinating AND he was late!

“Nice of you to show up,” his friend Amy grinned at him from her place at the supervisor desk. 

“Hey Amy, sorry. Long night,” he breezed past her and swiped in before changing into his own supervisor uniform as quickly as possible and then started to unload the staff dishwasher. Thankfully mornings at the pool were fairly slow and since Amy was here she had been able to cover for him. 

“This really hot guy came swimming this morning,” Steve jumped at the surprise of a low voice behind him. Of course it was his friend Clint, one of the pool maintenance staff and of course he noticed that he surprised Steve. Clint immediately started laughing. He was clumsy so it was rare that he actually succeed in surprising anyone, least of all Steve who was usually eternally vigilant. 

“How hot? Like as hot as Fireman Dad who comes on the weekends with his kids or somewhere in the middle like those college boys who show up in packs on Thursday nights?”

“Hotter than Fireman Dad.” 

Steven spun around, shocked, “there’s such thing as someone hotter than Fireman Dad?!”

“Yes! And younger.”

“You better text me ASAP if he ever shows up again I will get my lazy ass out of bed at 6am if I have to,” Steve insisted before heading out on deck to make sure the lifeguards on duty today were ready for their morning swimming lessons classes. Clint's laughter followed him out the door.

Unfortunately not even the promise of a possible hot new morning regular was enough to lift Steve’s spirits. Swimming lessons seemed to drag on and by the time the 11:30 swim time came around he was ready to go home. If Natasha called him at 6am tomorrow he most definitely would not be getting out of bed.

Finally the shift ended and Steve trudged out of the building. He’d ridden his motorcycle to work today in hopes that it would wake him up that morning and now he was regretting everything because he’d just remembered he needed groceries and there was no way he’d get them home on his bike. Annoyed at himself for not thinking ahead Steve made the short drive home, switched vehicles and went back into town to spend the remaining few dollars of his paycheck on enough food to keep him alive until he got paid in three days. 

It wasn’t that Steve was broke he had just run into a few unexpected bills this month and now he was working his ass off trying to finish commissions and work more hours at the pool in order to catch up again. Even though he had dropped out of college and had more wiggle room with his finances now it was still difficult to stay afloat sometimes, being an adult sucked. He knew that there were a few things he could do in order to make things easier on himself like sell the house and rent an apartment or sell his bike but Steve could never bring himself to part with them. 

Steve had lived almost his entire life in that house and he knew that his mom had fought tooth and nail for him to be able to have a stable place to live. She’d moved around a lot as a kid and didn’t want that for her own son so even after her husband had passed away Sarah was determined to be able to stay there. Steve shared the same determination that his mother did only his reasons for stay were mostly that he didn’t know how to let go. It had been almost two years now since cancer had taken her from him and he was unwilling to part with any connection to who she was. 

He felt the same way about the motorcycle. It was an older bike in almost perfect condition that could probably fetch a pretty price among collectors, in fact he’d had someone try to buy the bike out from under him more than once, but again it had value to Steve beyond monetary, no matter how tempting. Sarah loved this bike almost as much as she loved the house. It had been her husband's, Steve’s father, before his death and sometimes on clear nights she would take the bike out and not return until Steve was fast asleep. He knew that those were the nights she went off alone to mourn alone. Steve missed him too but he’d been too young to really know the man so for him the bike was another connection to Sarah that he was holding on to. 

The grocery store was quiet this afternoon so Steve took his time comparing prices in order to get as much as he could for what he had. More than once a parent and their little kid would grin and wave at him in passing or stop and chat and Steve happily obliged in conversation or returned their smiles. Most people in town had been to the pool and he’d taught so many swimming lessons that it was extremely common for kids to recognize him. Steve loved it. Sure lifeguarding wasn’t the most glamorous or high paying job but he enjoyed it and the kids in his swimming lessons classes adored him. Unfortunately he didn’t get to teach as often as before after being promoted to supervisor but it paid better and he had the experience the pool needed in a supervisor so despite having to move on from being in the water as often he’d applied when the position opened up. So far he didn’t regret it too much. 

“Hey Stevie, fancy meeting you here,” for the second time today Steve was started by a voice behind him and a strong hand settled on his lower back for a moment. 

This time Steve just laughed, recognizing the man instantly without even having to turn around, “Sam, hey!” 

His back felt empty when Sam removed his hand and stepped into Steve’s line of sight, “Hey you. How’s life? You surviving?”

“Of course I am. How’s things with you and Riley?” Sam was freshly married and Steve would be lying if he wasn’t just a bit jealous. The two of them had dated briefly and hooked up a few times after that but both of them knew they weren’t meant to be together and had ended things on a happy note when Sam met the man who was now his husband. In fact Steve would have been a groomsman if he’d been able to afford the trip to Mexico for their destination wedding. 

“Better than ever. We’re having a barbecue tomorrow evening actually, you free?”

Steve shrugged, hesitant to intrude on the newlyweds especially considering his past with Sam. Both men had told him a million times that it wasn’t a problem but Steve’s anxiety wouldn’t always let him believe it. 

“Oh don’t be like that. I can tell from your shopping basket that you’re on your last few packages of ramen noodles for the week. You’re coming.” Sam grinned at him and patted his shoulder before walking off towards the hamburger buns, leaving no room for Steve to protest. 

Steve watched him go a little sadly. Sam was everyone’s dream man with those big brown eyes and easy smile and Steve had found himself wishing more than once that things had worked out between them. Not that he wasn’t happy for his friend, he was just lonely. His house felt too big when he returned there alone each night and he would like nothing more than for someone to share it with. 

The loneliness didn’t go away, especially when he got into bed that night. Steve wasn’t really into one night stands or casual dating in general so it had been a long time since he’d shared a bed with anyone. Not that he was against it, he was just too busy or too poor to go out much. He’d never dated anyone else besides Sam and at this point he just wasn’t sure how to go about changing that. In college there’d been a girl that he would have asked out in and perhaps even married another life but they both knew that even though he loved women and identified as bisexual he definitely had a preference for men so the two of them had mutually agreed to just be friends and they were better off because of it. Peggy had gotten some sort of government job after that and Steve hadn’t seen her since but they stayed in touch as much as they could. 

Other lifeguards at the pool teased him relentlessly because he was the most popular target for patrons who were on the prowl. They always told him that he gave off this innocent vibe that made him especially good prey for the cougars. He didn’t think he was that innocent so he just shrugged when it came up because despite all the attention, he was still single. With a large sigh Steve rolled over and grabbed his body pillow, wrapping his arms around it and letting himself wallow in his loneliness as he drifted off to sleep.


	3. Reunions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky finally goes home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'VE FINALLY RETURNED TO THIS FIC. Lost my fanfic drive for awhile there and focused on writing my novel instead but here I am with more because it popped back into my head and I decided to try to finish it. Apologies in advance if I disappear again for another half a year? Enjoy :)

Bucky pulled into his mom’s driveway at exactly 10:00. He’d killed an hour swimming this morning and the rest of the morning driving around getting comfortable with the car and seeing how the town had changed but he couldn’t put it off any longer, it was time to go home. 

“James!” A young woman attacked him before he was even halfway to the door. 

“Rebecca, oh my god.” Bucky wrapped his arm around her tightly, clinging to his little sister for dear life. “I didn’t know you were going to be here.” He mumbled into her hair. 

“Mom told me you were coming home, of course I’m here.” She stepped back out of the half circle of his embrace, wiping away a few tears and turning to lead them both inside. Bucky followed her through the door and set down his bag before taking a deep breath and turning to face the woman waiting in the hallway for him. 

Wordlessly, Winifred Barnes stepped forward, tears streaming down her cheeks at the sight of her oldest child. Bucky knew exactly was she was seeing, he had spent enough time staring in the mirror trying to get used to it. His dark brown hair that was getting long hung to his chin and obscured his sunken hollow blue eyes until Bucky shook it impatiently out of the way. His long sleeve shirt hung off his 6’ tall frame, somewhat too big now because of the loss of muscle mass after the accident. And then there was the empty left sleeve that flapped uselessly by his side, evidence of what the war had taken from him. Her all-seeing eyes went to his face first, no doubt reading the pain hidden in the shadows and Bucky looked away, unable to hold up under her gaze. 

“Welcome home, son.” She murmured, wiping away her tears and coming to greet him with a long hug. Gentle hands conjured up a pin out of nowhere and she tucked his sleeve out of the way then reached up and wrapped his hair into a knot on the back of his head for him. Bucky couldn’t help but smile fondly. Ever the caretaker his mother had not changed one bit. She looked older than the last time he’d come home but still appeared to be much younger than her actual age. Grey hair streaked her temples and wrinkles had now appeared by her eyes but it did nothing but make her look more elegant. 

His appearance dealt with, Winnie led her son into the house and made him sit at the table and eat a full meal while Rebecca brought his suitcases inside and brought them upstairs for him. They shared small talk, catching up on anything that hadn’t been said in texts or phone calls the last few years, both of them carefully avoiding talking about the accident. By the time he was done eating Bucky was exhausted and excused himself from the table to go up to his old room. His mom had turned it into a guest bedroom since he’d left but the bed was the same and collapsing onto it was the best feeling in the world. Minutes later he was asleep, exhausted from travel, swimming, and coming home. 

***  
The next few days passed idyllically. Bucky always woke up early, old habits die hard, and it became a routine for him to go to the pool every morning. By the end of the week the lifeguards were starting to recognize him and he found out that the guard on duty most mornings was named Abby and the maintenance guy who’d smiled at him the first day was named Clint. 

This morning the pool was quieter than it had been the rest of the week. Only two lap swimmers occupied the lanes and since he didn’t have to worry about claiming a lane for himself Bucky opted to take some time in the hot tub instead of going right into his swim. He’d been sitting there for five minutes when Clint and a short woman stepped out of the staff room together. A woman who Bucky would recognize anywhere, no matter how many years it had been. The woman’s red hair stood out in contrast to the tight black racing swimsuit she wore and she stopped to tie it up before accepting the swim cap Clint was holding for her. Bucky’s breath caught in his throat and in less than three heartbeats he was out of the hot tub and walking towards the pair of them. 

“Hey gorgeous,” he felt the years slipping away as an easy smile spread across his lips, “fancy meeting you here.” The redhead froze in place, looking up at Clint who was gesturing towards him and murmuring something too low for Bucky to hear. Slowly she turned around and Bucky felt his throat close up when they locked eyes, her green ones flashing in a quick transition from annoyance to shock. 

“James,” she breathed, flying over to him with the quick steps of one long accustomed to walking on slippery pool decks. Bucky’s world shrank to that moment, to the woman in his arms.

Bucky used to be pretty emotional, he got it from his mom. Before the army he’d tear up easily and unashamedly over everything from cute dogs to a good book or his favourite character dying in a TV show. But after so many years of war it seemed he had run out of tears. He hadn’t cried when he woke up to discover his arm was gone and his teammates dead. His eyes had remained dry even during the reunion with his sister and his mother’s breakdown when she saw his shirt off for the first time and the scars that traced paths all over his torso. He thought maybe he was broken and would never feel anything again because so far he was a zombie walking around, forcing a smile or a frown whenever necessary. That was, until now, in the arms of this woman. 

Natasha Romanov. His high school sweetheart and long time best friend, the girl who he had shared all his firsts with, and the person he loved more fiercely than almost anyone else. It was her embrace that finally opened the floodgates and there, on the pool deck in front of the staff and patrons, James Buchanan Barnes cried for the first time since losing his first friend to the war back during his second tour. He would have collapsed to the floor if she hadn’t been holding him up, Natasha was stronger than she looked. 

“Hey come on now, James, don’t cry.” Bucky didn’t answer, couldn’t answer. Gently Natasha guided him off deck and into the staff room, explaining as she did, “I don’t work here anymore but the lifeguards won’t mind, everyone knows me.”

Bucky just kept crying. Until now it felt like he’d been in a trance. Overseas he had imagined coming home hundreds of times and after the crash while he lay in half a dozen different hospital rooms he’d dreamed of 10001 different scenarios of how that homecoming would go. But none of them involved running into his old best friend at 6:45am at the local swimming pool. Her hug had finally grounded him and he was finally convinced that this was real. He was home, and it wasn’t just another dream. He wasn’t going to wake up surrounded by unfamiliar faces and buzzing machines. And so Bucky cried. He cried for the loss of his arm, he cried for his fallen teammates, he cried for his family and what he’d put them through but mostly he cried with relief because he was safe. He was free and he was home. 

When he finally caught his breath he realized that they weren’t alone. Clint was there too, having come in to make sure she was okay and to get coffee. 

“So, uh, Nat, I take it you know this guy?” Clint was playing innocent, Bucky could tell that somehow he knew the answer.   
“Yes I do,” she smiled, turning to him. “You made me come today because you knew he’d be here didn’t you. HE’S the hot new regular you’ve been harassing me to come see. Why didn’t you just tell me it was James?” 

Bucky had no idea what was happening so he just stayed silent and watched while Clint ignored her question, hiding a smug grin by turning away to grab three coffee mugs and fill them up. Without further comment he deposited two mugs on the table for Bucky and Natasha, kissed the redhead on the top of her head and left the room with his own coffee in hand. After he was gone Bucky raised an eyebrow at Natasha who just shrugged and reached for her cup with her left hand. A ring on her fourth finger clinked against the glass as she did so and she broke out into a smile when Bucky started to tear up again at the sight of it.

“Congratulations,” he murmured, picking up his coffee mug and clinking it against hers gently in celebration before practically inhaling the hot liquid. He had time now that he was out of the military to enjoy coffee and not have to pour it down his throat before rushing off to the next mission but again, old habits die hard. Nat shook her head at him and immediately gave him a refill. When she came back to hand it to him Bucky stopped her by catching her left hand with his. The ring was perfect for her. Three stones set in a silver band- two of them amethyst and the third, a moderately sized diamond, sparkled between the purple stones. “I’m happy for you,” he grinned, kissing her hand gently and then letting her go.

Nat smiled fondly, pulling her hand back and looking at the ring for a moment before going back to her seat across from him. “Thanks James. I didn’t even know I wanted to marry him until he proposed. He chose the ring on his own, probably for the best as you and I both know how indecisive I can be.”

They both laughed. “And you said yes,” he supplied.

“I said yes. I said yes before I even realized what was happening.” She allowed herself another soft smile and then changed the subject. “So when did you get back? Clint has been buzzing about you all week. Of course I didn’t know it was you and he kept harassing me all week to come swim in the morning so I could see this new regular everyone was talking about. I realize now that he must have recognized you from our old pictures together and wanted to surprise me.”

“Well that explains why he looked at me so funny the first time I saw him. I thought he was just ogling my dazzling good looks.” Bucky jokes, trying to hide how touched he is that Clint orchestrated this meeting. 

“Oh he was. Your nickname is ‘Hot Soldier Boy’, upgraded from his original name for you as ‘Tall, Dark, and Broody.’ However I like that one better now that I know it’s you.” Natasha smirks at him. 

“I got back on Monday,” Bucky supplies after a brief lull in conversation, going back to the question she had asked. 

“And the first thing you did was come here?” she laughed, “Classic.” 

“It was 6 in the morning! I wasn’t about to waltz in on my mom well before dawn.” 

“Fair enough. So how did that go? Returning home?”

“Mom cried. Becca cried.” he sighed and summed up the rest of the week briefly. “And now I guess there’s nothing to do but readjust.” 

Natasha nodded at that and stood up as if recognizing his desire for the conversation to be over. “Well I don’t know about you but I came here for a swim. How about we get out there and claim a lane before the late risers show up and waste space talking to each other instead of swimming.” Bucky couldn’t help but agree, relieved for the escape. 

“Bet you breakfast that even with one arm I’m still faster than you,” he challenged her, attempting to make light of his situation. 

“Bring it on.”


End file.
